The Edge....Are You Willing To Enter At Your Own Risk?

Did you ever think you were on the edge of something?  Did you step out on it?  Or maybe you were always fearful of falling, so you never went out to the edge.

Blaring T.V.'s, ringing phones, screaming kids who shine flashlights in your eyes and noisy crank horns in your ear....it's enough to drive you crazy.  Who can think with all the noise?  Turn down the noise.  Talk a walk down my Sunset Drive.....were the street is straight and narrow and seems to go on forever.

One night, as I was out walking down Sunset Drive, I felt as if I actually found THE straight and narrow path that I had been looking for.  The night was dry and hot.  The air felt heavy.  The road was long, but felt like a porthole to a new reality.  I walked as though I was headed into a new dimension.  Here I am.  The new me.  The one I had been working on so hard to try and crack THE code....the one that leads me into my calling.  I don't know if I ever will really KNOW what my true calling is or if there even is ONE true calling, but this week....I found the real me.  The funny, witty, happy person I always wished I could be.  How did I get here?  Where was I going?

As I made my way to Vineyard Beach, I notice a sign decorated the arbor gate entrance, but I didn't read it, I just noticed it was there.  I was interested in the sunset.  I wondered if I was too late.  As I approached the edge of the park, I could barely see the bright glow of the sun peeking out through the trees.  Oh how amazing.  I made it.  It was a brilliant orange ball of light heading for a new tomorrow.  I couldn't take my eyes off of it.  I continued closer to the edge where the old wooden fence kept park patrons safe from falling down the crumbling, wave beaten cliffed shoreline.  As I got to the edge....I literally thought....oh how amazing, I am on the edge of glory.  I just sat there in complete and utter awe.

As I leaned against the fence, I looked a little closer.  I saw something far off in the distance.  I couldn't really make it out. It looked like a black dot.  As my eyes focused, the boat had a passenger of one.  A kayak.  One lonely passenger in a big "ocean" of water.  Maybe it wasn't so lonely.  There was another black dot far behind the first.  There were two.  One further ahead of the other.  No worries I thought.  It isn't a race.  It's all about the journey.  I am confident the guy in back knew that too.  One moves ahead, the other catches up, then moves ahead again.  Ebb and flow.  The cycle of life.  Calm.  Cool.  Collected.  Some days are sour grapes and others are a fine aroma of a dry Chianti.  That's just how life is.  No race (well, o.k. it is a race....but it's not a 5k or a 13.1, but a 26.2---I finally figured out those damn stickers on the cars) 

Things take time to shake out.  Sometimes..... people drop out of the race only to retrain again for something even bigger than before.  Smelling roses is great, but only lasts a few seconds (before you start sneezing, that is).  I was sad to see the sun go, but I realized it was opening up a new tomorrow else where in the world.  I made my way back to the entrance of the park.  As I crossed under the arbor gate,  I looked back and read the sign that had always been there.  It said....enter at your own risk.  If I didn't enter at my own risk, mine eyes wouldn't have seen the glory.  I saw something amazing.  Something not many in a lifetime get to see.   I was on the edge and it felt amazing.

Are you willing to take risks?  Are you willing to step out and look for the edge?  Take a look around.  Then take another look around.  And still another.  What do you see?  If you ever find where the sidewalk ends, take a look again.  It might be worth the risk to question if that statement is really true.

Sometimes You Just Gotta Listen To Your Gut

One of my first memories working for a retail giant was an encounter I had with my MM.  I considered him the head honcho at the time, since I was just a newbie starting out and the President and CEO where still a mystery to me.  There I stood at the center of our buying world, smack dab in front of the vending machine.  What was I in the mood for?  I needed to grab something to sustain me...today there wasn't much time for a choked down grilled salmon and vegetables.  As I stood there blank in front of so many choices, I felt a de ja vu. 

I was 9. It was summer.  Us neighbor kids were finally allowed to ride our bikes to what we considered the Willy Wonka capital of the world.  How simple life was back then.  It didn't seem so simple at the time.  So many choices. I  had carte blanche choice of what my little world consisted of... candy, gum, ice cream, a Slurpie or even dare I, a Big Gulp.  What did I want?  It seemed to me an infinite amount of choices...hundreds, thousands maybe...(I know I said infinite, but that was what my infinite consisted of at the time).  I kinda felt like the kid on U Tube who was so afraid to say Happy Birthday Roseanne on camera.  What if I picked the wrong one?  Which one would be the best buy for my money?  I mean come on....even a kid wants to get the most bang for his buck. 

And then....there it was...that voice. A presence which only felt like the wind....One minute there, the next gone.

"Come on Laurie. Make a decision; you're in retail."   I never pushed a button so fast or made a decision so quick in my short little career.  That was a defining moment in my life.

What did I learn?  Some times you have to go with your gut.  Have you ever heard the saying.... you either have it or you don't?  (Talent that is).  If you feel you have the talent and get that gut feeling....then sometimes you have to go with your gut.  Most times....everything needs to be a complete thought process.  But....when you don't know which way to go or are forced to make a decision....you gotta just go with your gut.  You never know what you might learn.

Energy Can Not Be Created Nor Destroyed

 Boom. Boom. Pow.

A Painted Picture For Anyone With Glasses

Tonight....I went for a walk.  A walk for me.  A walk designed for no other reason but to follow Newtons law....a body in motion stays in motion.

 As I reached the end of Sunset Drive, I crossed the street to an old beach terrace taken care of by an old home owners association.  The only mantainance done is mowing.  The fence stands rusted and neglected. The old beach access stairs have fallen pry to the erie of the lake. No one really visits this place anymore.  My old friend Shel Silverstien might say....it's where The Sidewalk Ends.

There must be a few who can see past where the sidewalk ends.  There's a path made by those who can see.  Many they are not, because I have never seen anyone there before, but I can see where their feet have stepped.  I edged down the side of the cliff where the rocks were decorated with overgrown grasses, weeds and bent trees.  I had to watch my step because a storm had just passed and we all know the saying "slippery when wet".  Needless to say I was scared to death that I was going to anger or scare some animal who made this space their home.  But tonight, there were no creatures around.  Just me.

As I got closer, I could hear the thunderous crashing waves.  Soon enough, emerged the old jettie that made the beach.  I could feel the power that was harnessed in the lake, which I must say relics the ocean without a beat.  Right before my eyes lay a painting made just for me.  I sat.  I saw.  I felt.  There before me layed the colors I told my 3rd grade teacher don't exist.  She wanted me to paint a water color of the sky in yellow, orange, red, purple and barely blue.  That isn't possible I told her.  I have never seen a sky look like that before.  Today, there it lay before me.  The sun, the sky, the "ocean" and me.  All in a state of being.

There was only one problem....my ego whispered in my ear how golden brown my skin looked in the late evening light.  You're right, I said.  Then I continued to sit. Still. Full of potential.  I harnessed the air with my arms and said, I am finally ready.  Ready to face the world.  Ready to fly like the wind.  Ready to stand tall.  Ready to be me. So....do you have your glasses on today?  Are you able to see the colors that may not exist?  I am.